‘WE MUST FIGHT HATE’

For some in Brevard, tragedy led to decade of action

Britt Kennerly Florida Today | USA TODAY NETWORK – FLORIDA

Bill McKay didn’t know any of the 49 people who died at the hands of a gunman at the Pulse nightclub in downtown Orlando on June 12, 2016. ● Nor had he met any of the 58 people who were injured in the early morning mass shooting. ● But on the 10th anniversary of the massacre and beyond, what he can do — what everyone can do, McKay said — is honor them through action.

Amanda Grau is comforted by her spouse, Jazmin, in front of Pulse in downtown Orlando on June 12, 2021, the fifth anniversary of the mass shooting at the nightclub. Amanda was wounded in the incident that killed 49 people.

CRAIG BAILEY/FLORIDA TODAY

“I didn’t need to know them to feel the loss,” said the West Melbourne resident, president of the Space Coast LGBTA Democratic Caucus.

“Part of the strength of our community is the shared experiences of growing up in a world where we are viewed as different,” McKay said.

“Each loss in our community is felt as the loss of a family member. I remember we had a Pulse vigil to honor and grieve the victims in Eau Gallie, and our Pride community had a memorial to honor them at that year’s Pride festival. Each event was a sad reminder of how fragile life is.”

A decade later, reflections and connections are flowing across Florida, for everyone from families and friends of those slain to survivors, and in events from public and private memorial services to art exhibits.

Along with McKay, FLORIDA TODAY talked with Brevard residents Daniel McDow, the Rev. Joel Tooley and Shelley Rodden, all of whom were spurred to action in different ways by the horror that unfolded in the wee hours that Sunday morning on Orange Avenue.

Here are their stories.

Bill McKay and Daniel McDow: ‘Something needed to be done’

Bill McKay, 63, came out as a gay man in1978. He and Daniel McDow, a widower who came out late in life, married in February 2016.

McKay lived “through the early days of the fight for rights of our community, the hatred aimed at me and others related to coming out as a gay man, and surviving the AIDS crisis.”

All of that, he said, “formed my mindset.”

So, as the news broke about the Pulse shooting, McKay recalled, he was “horrified, shocked, angry but, sadly, not surprised.”

Looking back, he said, he can’t help but view the Pulse massacre as a prelude to the decade to come Unfortunately, he added, he believes Florida has been “used as a proving ground for the rest of the nation.”

“Our politicians have used the LGBTQ+ community to fuel fear in our state,” he said. “More recently the transgender community, our most marginalized, has suffered the most.”

But the reach of these laws can also spread to other areas such as gun rights, education, health and personal rights, McKay said.

“Human rights have always been my red line. We all deserve the same rights to exist and flourish as ourselves. You can only fear us if you don’t know us. We can only keep moving forward, standing up and speaking out,” he said.

“Our community has been able to fight many but not all of the bad legislative bills. This is how we honor the victims, by resisting and continuing the fight. Every loss of life is devastating. It is up to those of us that are still here to protect ourselves and secure a safe future for our youth. Do we get tired? Yes. Do we fight on? Yes.

“Failure is not an option.” McDow, who was elected to the West Melbourne City Council in 2020, isn’t sure he would have entered the world of politics were it not for “the wake-up call of June 12, 2016.”

He and McKay had just married in February of that year. They were, McDow said, “in our infancy stage of activism in supporting LGBTQ organizations.”

The horror of the deaths and injuries at an Orlando changed everything.

“The Pulse shooting catapulted our level of participation and soon after we were full speed ahead,” said McDow, president of the Space Coast Progressive Alliance.

“Soon after, I transitioned into politics and became president of the LGBTA Democratic Caucus. Bill put his heart and soul into Space Coast Pride and lobbying behind the scenes.”

The mass shooting, he said, triggered emotions and inner strength that he had not known he had.

“Coming out late in life and not understanding the hate for my new family was disturbing,” he said.

“Something needed to be done. I put my energies into the community and cofounded Awake Brevard.”

McDow, the first openly gay elected official in Brevard, is now a candidate for Florida House District 33, saying he’s running “to have our voices heard. We cannot allow this hateful, destructive behavior to continue. We must join in solidarity.”

The thought of “all these innocent people from all levels of society lost” continues to drive McDow, he said.

“I have been part of the vigils; seen the site. I have spoken to folks and shared their stories of friends they lost,” he said.

“Pulse has solidified my convictions. We must not be silent. We must fight for all marginalized communities. We must fight hate.”

Shelley Rodden: ‘A feeling I’ll never forget’

Satellite Beach resident Shelley Rodden recalls hearing about the Pulse shooting as she drove back to the Space Coast from Atlanta.

“I had never been to Pulse but ironically had been chatting with a dear friend earlier in the evening about where we could go dancing in a safe environment. Pulse was mentioned,” she said.

“We decided to check it out soon. Needless to say, upon hearing the details of the shooting, I felt numb. The whole thing felt surreal. I recall wearing a Gay Lives Matter shirt the next day and total strangers asking me if I was OK, and if I needed a hug. I did.”

In the aftermath of the shooting, Rodden attended several candlelight vigils, both in Melbourne and Orlando. She remembers the profound sadness on the faces of everyone she saw.

“It was a feeling I will never forget,” she said.

In the years since Pulse, Rodden said, she has dedicated her life to advocate for her LGBTQ+ community. She has participated in organizing rallies, marches and safe social gatherings on the Space Coast, and currently serves as youth director for Space Coast Pride, the largest LGBTQ+ organization on the Space Coast.

“I have fought for change in Tallahassee against discrimination in our community,” she said. “I started a Gay Straight Alliance at the high school I taught at and became a youth director with our local chapter of PFLAG, to create and promote safe spaces for our queer youth.”

The actions people take to remember those killed and those injured at Pulse matter, she said.

“Honoring those lost should never end,” she said.

“Honoring them with action for gun reform should matter to everyone, not just the LGBTQ+ community.”

The Rev. Joel Tooley: ‘It is the love of Christ that compels me’

The nightmare at Pulse was lifechanging for Joel Tooley, of Melbourne Church of the Nazarene, where he and his wife, Pam, are co-pastors.

Days after the horrific violence at the nightclub, Tooley said, he was gripped by the compulsion to help those who survived as well as families of the survivors.

“A pastor friend of mine, the Rev. Dr. Gabriel Salguero, reached out to tell me that his congregation in Orlando would be providing funeral services for families and asked if I would be available to help,” he said.

Tooley’s response was a ready “Yes.” “One family we ministered to was carrying two heavy losses — their son was killed that fateful night and then their pastor refused to help them because he did not want to be associated with the LGBTQ+ community,” Tooley said.

“Regardless of how one perceives the LGBTQ+ community theologically, the people whose lives were forever changed that night are people created with the deepest love of God and deserve to be loved, cared for and ministered to with the grace and peace of Christ. Jesus says, ‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.’ ” What Tooley discovered in those immediate days after the massacre, he said, “was that this community was indeed weary and burdened.”

And what they needed, he said, was to be offered rest “that only comes from believing in the lyrics of that ageless children’s chorus, ‘Jesus loves me - this I know; for the Bible tells me so. Little ones to Him belong; they (we) are weak, but He is strong.’

“That experience changed me as a pastor — I learned in those days to follow Jesus in the way he modeled care for each person in front of Him,” Tooley said.

“He offered love and salvation without asking about gender identity. He offered love and salvation without asking about political affiliation. He offered love and salvation without asking for their immigration status. It is the love of Christ that compels me.”

Britt Kennerly is education/breaking news/Style editor at FLORIDA TODAY. Contact Kennerly at 321-917-4744 or bkennerly@floridatoday.com. Twitter: @bybrittkennerly Facebook: /bybrittkennerly.

Survivors and their supporters gathered at Pulse in downtown Orlando on June 12, 2021, the fifth anniversary of the mass shooting that killed 49 people.

PHOTOS BY CRAIG BAILEY/FLORIDA TODAY

Tina Aldrich writes a tribute to Pulse victims and survivors on the sign outside the former nightclub on June 12, 2021.